Wednesday, January 16, 2008

I know, I know. . . .

I say that a lot lately.

I find myself having to defend my decision to believe Roger Clemens. It's getting a bit annoying--I mean, if "innocent until proven guilty" doesn't work for somebody, my logic won't either, no doubt.

And certainly, members of the media are joyfully painting him in dark colors (although that's been going on for awhile), slanting public opinion even more than it was.


You know, if Clemens is proven to have used, I won't be surprised. Nor will I be devastated, outraged, angry, etc. It's a game, after all. I'm annoyed that my tax dollars went toward the writing of an incomplete, possibly in part nonfactual "report" that no doubt only scratched the surface of use. I'm even more annoyed that our current Congress feels the need to appear on television over steroids in baseball. (I doubt Ron Paul would approve, by the way.)

But consider this scenario (entirely fictitious). Ivana Trump is arrested for shoplifting a fur coat. She is looking at serious time, because the value of the item makes it a felony. The cops thinks it's remotely possible that she stole the coat to resell it, so they start pressuring her to name her fence. She refuses, and they play hardball, making her cry, at which point she says, "It's the Donald's fault!" The cops are so intrigued and excited by the possibility of catching Donald Trump at something nefarious that they offer Ivana immunity for prosecution of the coat theft, as long as she doesn't lie. She agrees to the terms, then says that the Donald used to beat her. She has battered wife syndrome, and that's why she stole the coat. While she's at it, she states that her second ex-husband also hit her around. The cops are like, "Hmm. Did anyone else see the Donald hit you?" She says no, because he only did it when it was just the two of them. Then the cops ask, "Did you ever call the cops?" No. "Why not?" Because if she had turned him in, the Donald would have left her and she would have lost her livelihood. The cops ask if there is any evidence--photos of bruises, etc. Ivana says no, it didn't occur to her to keep records. So while it is her word against hers, when the story hits the press, the cops state that they believe Ivana because she was under pressure to tell the truth. The public goes bananas--"We knew that asshole was bad--this proves it!" Meanwhile, the second ex-husband confesses: "Yeah, I hit her, but it was just a couple of times. I justified it at the time, but then I felt bad so I never did it again. If my actions offended anyone I'm sorry." He is hailed as a class act, while the press jumps on the confession--"She was telling the truth about him! Why would she lie about one but not the other! It must all be true! Crucify him!"

I know, I know.

But it is at least possible, that while definitely a jerk, Roger Clemens might not be a steroid user.


Post a Comment

<< Home